Hi friends,
I hope you are all doing well.
For the past four years, I haven’t posted anything on social media for many different reasons. One reason is that I’m a father of four, and my kids seem to have my phone in their hands most of the time!
But another reason is that social media has become increasingly divisive. Too often, people and entire communities are judged or blamed as a group for the problems and conflicts happening in the world. When we begin to see people only through the group they belong to, it becomes easier to misunderstand one another and unfortunately, we have seen this contribute to hatred and hate crimes against different communities.
But what happens when we take a step back and see one another as individuals? I believe we often discover that we have much more in common than we realize.
I want to share something that happened to me last Saturday evening.
I was driving north on Leslie Street to meet some friends when I noticed a man walking and at times almost running north in the same direction I was going. He was very visibly dressed in the traditional clothing of a particular Jewish community.
For full disclosure, my wife is Jewish, and so are my children, so I am quite familiar with the Jewish community and with some of the traditions surrounding Shabbat.
In Judaism, Shabbat begins at sundown on Friday and ends at sundown on Saturday. During Shabbat, some Orthodox Jewish communities refrain from activities considered work, including driving, using public transportation, and using electronic devices such as phones.
Because of the way this man was dressed, I recognized that he was likely from a particular Orthodox Jewish community whose community is about two hours away from where he was walking.
As I continued driving, I started thinking about his family. I wondered if his wife and children were waiting for him at home and worrying about where he was. Because he was observing Shabbat, they would not be able to simply call him or track his location.
Knowing how much antisemitism the Jewish community has experienced in our city and how vulnerable many people have felt, I began thinking, “Maybe I should turn around and see if I can help.”
So I made a U-turn.
I introduced myself and asked him, “It looks like you’re walking home. Are you coming from the hospital?”
He told me that his wife had not been feeling well, and they had spent a long time at the hospital. He had arranged for her to take an Uber home because of her condition, while he was walking home.
He explained that because his wife was sick, she was permitted to break Shabbat restrictions when necessary for her health. He, however, was trying to walk the entire way home a journey of about two and a half hours as it was getting dark.
I told him that I understood why he was walking and that I respected his desire to observe Shabbat, but that I was willing to drive him home if it would help.
He immediately told me that he was worried about his wife and children. His wife was not feeling well, and he was concerned that by the time she got home, she might not be well enough to take care of their children.
I told him, “Whatever I can do to make this easier for you, I’m willing to help.”
He explained that if he accepted the ride, I would need to open the car door for him so that he wouldn't have to do it himself, and I would also need to open the door when we arrived.
After about 15 minutes of thinking it over, he decided to let me drive him home.
During the drive, we talked about many things.
I learned that he is originally from New York and is currently in Canada working as a teacher. He told me how much he loves living here and how kind Canadians have been to him.
As we continued talking, we realized that we actually had a lot in common.
On the surface, we seemed very different.
He is Jewish; I am not.
He observes Shabbat very strictly; I do not.
He dresses according to the traditions of his community; I dress very differently.
But underneath all of those differences, we were simply two human beings having a conversation.
He is a husband who was worried about his wife and running home.
He is a father who was concerned about his children so much so that, as soon as I opened the door for him, he hugged me, thanked me, and then continued running home. I found the moment so beautiful that I took a picture of him as he continued running home, just so I could show it to my wife.
And as a husband and a father I was able to understand him.
Those things gave us a foundation to understand one another and relate to each other as individuals.
I don't know how his wife and children are doing today because we couldn't exchange contact information on Shabbat. But I have thought about them since that evening, and I sincerely hope they are doing well.
I wanted to share this story because I believe it is a small reminder of something we desperately need in our world:
We need to look past the labels and take the time to see the person.
Before we see someone as Jewish, Christian, Muslim, Black, white, immigrant, Canadian, American, or anything else, we can first see them as a person a husband, a wife, a father, a mother, a son, a daughter, a neighbour, or simply another human being trying to make it through life.
We may have more in common than we think.
So to this man and his family, and all of you wherever you are:
Shabbat Shalom.
May your weekend be peaceful and restful.
And to everyone reading this:
Love your neighbor as yourself.” Leviticus 19:18
God is Love
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